The Peacemaker Personality #9

The Peacemaker Personality #9

As the name suggests, one of the core traits of those possessing the Peacemaker temperament is the desire for harmony. People with this personality will go to the ends of the earth to avoid conflict.

Asserter Personality – Type 8 on the Enneagram

Asserter Personality – Type 8 on the Enneagram

The most independent of all the personality types, Asserters may be viewed by others as the toughest with whom to get along. Read this month's blog to find out more about this unique temperament.

The Adventurer Personality Type 7

The Adventurer Personality Type 7

Extroverted, spontaneous, spirited and playful, Adventurers or Enthusiasts possess an optimistic, versatile approach to life. With a basic desire to be satisfied, people with this temperament fear being deprived. Discover more about this personality type and the part it plays in a relationship.

The Questioner Personality – Type 6

The Questioner Personality – Type 6

Have you ever met anyone who was exceptionally hard-working, reliable, and committed, yet was haunted by self-doubt and possessed a deeply rooted need for support and security?

If you or your partner possess the fundamental traits listed above, you are categorized as a Questioner, a.k.a. a Loyalist.

The Individualist Personality Type

The Individualist Personality Type

Those possessing the Individualist personality type are acutely self-aware. Sensitive and emotionally honest, these people are incredibly creative and inspired. Their deepest fear is that they have no personal significance.

 

The Achiever Personality Type

The Achiever Personality Type

Are you an Achiever or are you partnered with one? If you or your partner fit into the category of "Achiever", watch for overly ambitious tendencies that can adversely affect what could otherwise be a healthy relationship.

The Perfectionist Personality Type

The Perfectionist Personality Type

The Perfectionist is one of the nine personality types. Also called the Reformer, Perfectionists are rational and principled, as well as purposeful and self-controlled, often to the point of being overly critical of themselves and others. Learn more about this personality type and their impact in a relationship.

Understanding Basic Personality Traits

Understanding Basic Personality Traits

Having a familiarity with ourselves, which includes understanding our personality traits as well as our strengths and weaknesses, helps guide us in our relationship choices.

Multicultural Relationship Advice: Embrace & Celebrate Your Differences!

Multicultural Relationship Advice:  Embrace & Celebrate Your Differences!

Here are some basic rules to follow for those looking for harmony in a multicultural relationship or marriage.

Brad and Angelina: What Can We Learn from Serial Marriage?

Brad and Angelina: What Can We Learn from Serial Marriage?

The recent separation of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie gives us some insights into the importance of self-discovery and learning lessons before moving into the next relationship.

Ask Pam: Advice on a Recent Break Up

I recently received an inquiry on my Facebook page from a woman who had a question about her response to a recent break up. Below is her question and my advice.

"I had been dating this guy for the past six months and he decided to drop the bomb in the middle of a dinner date at a fine dining restaurant. I really felt blind-sided and was so upset he didn't deliver the news in a more thoughtful, intimate and sensitive manner. My emotions got the best of me and I landed a stinging slap across his face and walked out. It was in the city so I took a cab home. While I'ms till resentful of how he handled it, I feel like I should do the mature and responsible thing and apologize for the slap. I don't really feel like calling him so would an apology note via email or regular mail be appropriate?" ~Erika P.

Hi Erika,

Here is my advice: Closure is always good, so sending an email (not a text), is a good idea. With that said, your immediate reaction was understandable, particularly when the news was unexpected and delivered in a public venue and in a very impersonal way. Interestingly enough, guys often think the way to let someone down is over dinner. Perhaps, that seems easiest and best for them, but it's a horrible experience for the receiver. It is, quite frankly, in poor taste. So, I think it is fine for you to write a nice email, explaining that you are truly sorry for your physical reaction to the way in which he chose to announce he was ending your relationship, but that had he been in your situation, he might have acted similarly. Thank him for the good times you have shared over the past six months, wish him well and educate him that for future, when he is wanting to exit a relationship to give the other party the courtesy and respect of doing it in a private place where there can be civil conversation and both persons can part with a better understanding of all of the pros and cons about the relationship, so your next relationships will be better for each of you.

Forgive and move on with three things in mind:

1) Be prepared to go into the next relationship when you feel strong and happy with yourself

2) Watch for red flags early when dating, so they can be addressed.

3) Vet your partner thoroughly for lifestyle similarities, interests, passions and pay close attention to how they treat you and others with whom they come across as your relationship is progressing.

Do you have a question about your relationship? Need some advice?

I would be more than happy to offer guidance. Feel free to email me or post a private message on my Facebook Page

The Four Horsemen of the (Relationship) Apocalypse

The Four Horsemen of the (Relationship) Apocalypse

Throughout his 40 years of relationship research, John Gottman has identified what he calls “the four horsemen of the apocalypse”, four behaviors that are key indicators of a relationship’s demise. This blog outlines these behaviors as well as how to avoid them.